Caribert

 

I HAVE DEHYA.

I HAVE DEHYA'S WEAPON.

I HAVE DEHyA'S C1.

I don't have mona sadly, but uh, DEHYA. I HAVE DEHYA I LOVE DEHYA HERE'S THE WISHING VIDEO:

YEAH!! okay let's uh let's start

gosh I wish I had mona...

anyways uh LET'S START

AYYYYYYYY PORT ORMOS

(insert zyox singing)

yyyyyup! that's me!

LMAOOOOOO Was it kaeya??

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, it was kaeya, wasn't it

woahhh that's a new menu! Usually letters and papers just make the screen black!

thanks kaeya!

EYY IT'S MY BOY

also I forgot to mention it but I've been having some technical issues so we're playing on super low graphics rn, you may've noticed.

lmao it would've been funny that's for sure

oh, well, yep! that DOES make sense!!

lmaooo  just like him

NEAR SUMERU? hm, that's interesting! don't the aranara have a special name for kaenri'ah? kaenri'ahn ruins? dunno!

AAAAAAAA IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING KAEYA AND DAINSLEIF ARe GOING TO INTERACT OMGG

and then DAIN APPEARS!!!!

okay and THEN dain appears

UUH WAHT THEY CAHNGED THE PRONOUNCIATION also NOW dain shows up!

HEY DAIN LMAOOOOOOOOO

"Who the heck starts a conversation like that, you just sat down!"

yyyyup!

hmm... so does that mean pierro can't be his grandpa anymore?

TELL ME MORE ABOUT MONDSTADT PLEASE.

yep!

well, possibly? we know that he's NOT involved with the fatui, if that means anything.

nope!

eyy they can be besties

nah, our sibling's just of high rank, ne?

ah, I see, so the original alberich is dead? would that be kaeya's father, or kaeya's grandfather?

ooh,  ibet this is cuz of the chasm stuff

well I suspect that the "Loom of Fate" is just something else entirely and the loom of fate operation is just named after it

hm, did dain and aether get split up in sumeru? The aranara mentioned aether but never dainsleif

LMAOOOO i forgot to take a screenshot but dain was like "NOW IS NOT THE TIME." and we were like "why??" and he was like "because my drink isn't here yet" lol

ooh and then they turn into a hilichurl right

GO GO, FOREST RANGERS!!

okay and then we're gonna see something SUPER HORRIFIC, right?

oh.

(also I really gotta get these graphics sorted soon...)

Like from the trailer! Damn, SOMEONE must have 7 years of bad luck!! Is that how they turn into a hilichurl?

omg dehya reference, also that's a purposeful reflection, reflections are turned off for me

omg it's baizhu's old house real

AGH! HOW CAN DEHYA BEAT THEM!?!?

HELLYEAHHHH

I love you, paimon! Can't say the same for the rest of the community, though

SCREW YOU HEAVENLY PRINCIP-- *lightning*

not even a good-morning!?!?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooo

OMG! OMG!! THAT WAS SARAH-MILLER CREWS?!?!?!?

hello mr... I wanna say cryo abyss herald?

Hilichurl!? Hilichurl from the trailer!?!?

hehehe~~

Eide! what does he mean "once?"

YES. I WANTED TO KNOW THIS TOO, I'VE BEEN (here) WAITING FOr THE LONGEST TIME

R A C I S M .

aw...

oh? I wanted to take a photo, hmm...

...

Heya!! Just got back from a lengthy shower!

it got me thinking, uh,

1. sorry for calling you an abyss herald, eide!

and, this means pierro is a kaenri'ahn.. pureblood? native..?

anyways, let's conintue!

oh..?

h.. huh!?!?

oh, I see! that makes sense!! thanks nahida (my personal bestie btw)

hm? a red rukkhashava mushroom? uh, kusanalishava...

yep! I have quite a few! 

hmm... well, uh, let's uh, just do it..?

ah, I see.

maybe, nahida doesn't know as much about kaenri'ah compared to the other gods, but uh, I don't think eide'd be too happy about it.

wait. 

did he have black hair this whole time..?

oh he did idk why I thought he had grey hair LMAOO

Caribert? Caribert!!!

AGGHHHhh, I love eide so much

hmm.. yeah. he loves his son more than he hates the gods, that's a fact.

SICK 'EM!

no.. no way. it has to be another hilichurl.

thought so. other than the silk scarf, eide can probably sense caribert's presence

ohh, well this is obviously the chasm. aside from the obvious chasm music, we KNOW that the chasm connects to sumeru.

aaaahh how I've missed the chasm's dynamic music~

the bowing hilichurls suddenly attacked us! odd.

woah. I'm assuming this is a teleport spot, like in that one dream sequence, and nahida's story quest.

ha knew it

LUMINE. VOICELINES. lol when she said "is this..." I ThOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA SAY AN SAANSWER FRMO THSI WORLD

PYRO SLIMES?? Oh no, CAN DEHYA DO IT?!?!

NOOOOOO SHE COULDN'T DO IT

well to be fair she's lvl70 with a lvl50 weapon, also I haven't activated c1 yet

woah. it's so weird to hear lumine's actual voicelines...

Agh! Cryo lector!!!

"uh, um, actually:"

*eide pulls out his "I'm a kaenri'ahn" passport*

*lumine pulls out the "my brother's the abyssal prince" passport*

herald: defeated!

h u h . . ?

oh, cuz he's under the curse but still mainains consciousness? gotcha

hm. okay... 

..uh oh.

YEAH-!!!!

YEAH WHO THE HECK ARE YOU LMAO

OMG, AGH, OMG, GAGAWG, HE'S OKAY? HE'S OKAY! HE'S OKAY!!!!

YAYYYYYYYY OMG OMG YAYYYYYY WE DID IT YESSSSS

no...

hm.. no..?

wha.. uh, judging frmo the trailer I don't think that'll happen

Hi caribert!!! as long as he's okay, this quest ends on a high note.

WHERE IS HE

CARIBERT. Caribert AAGH THANK GOD

okay? mind exaplINInG WHAT HAPAPEnED Lieke SUch AS IS CARiBERT OKAY PELASE PALESe EPLaeASe eTELLE ME

WHAT.

OH NO.

leave him alone...

holy SHIT he misgendered her!

WTF WHY IS SHE AETHER

WAS THAT ALL A DREAM?????

ah... well, that explains it. we were reliving AETHER's memories.

so, if caribert is chlothar's son, then who's kaeya's dad..?

oh... I see.

HUH WHAT? HOW  CAN YOU TELL THEIR SEXES IF THEY'RE SKELTONS???

who? chlothar?

oh, right

hmm...

well

that's the end.

I'm left with a WhOLE LOT of questions.

hmm...

until next time...

THRERE'S BUG IN M ROOM A

~moon